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I have a LOT of blog posts to look through! If you’re looking for something specific, like “shadow work” or “text mapping”, I suggest using Google with your search words and “ubu skills”.
NOTE: I’ve recently migrated my free content to the tools section of this website. If a link to a free guide is broken, you’ll find the resource in tools.
Say No. And Mean It.
As women, or people pleasers, saying no can feel excruciating. We want to be everything to everyone. We probably have been, and creating boundaries around that is hard. But it’s also necessary. Because the truth is: we actually can’t be everything for everyone. We’ll just be luke warm weak tea versions of everything. Yuck.
Fake It ‘til You Make It? Hard Pass.
I keep seeing this come up from biz leaders, and each time I literally grimace.
These people aren’t trying to cause you harm! But what they are doing is adding fuel to your Imposter Syndrome.
3 Things You Learned in High School Can Help Land Your Dream Job
If you’ve ever done any kind of theatre class in your life (high school on up), you’ll have a basic understanding of how to breathe and speak using your diaphragm, how to play the “Yes, and” improv game and what it’s like to play a character in a costume.
And you’ve likely never thought about that stuff beyond your high school play. Right?
But you should!
Confidence Vs. Bravado
I couldn't hold this topic in any longer. I've been sitting on it for months (if not years). It has to do with leadership and it has to do with how we see others, and how we see ourselves.
And it's difficult. And it's going to piss some of you off.
But honestly, I'm walking straight into my fears this year. (I'm still working through wanting everyone to like me.)
Why You Should Journal
I know. No, really. Trust me - I know. I have resisted daily journaling for 25 years, ever since I learned about The Artist’s Way and morning pages.
All of my friends (most of them actors, at the time) were doing morning pages and noticing huge results.
I resisted.
Why I Love Tarot
For my 23rd birthday, my best friend gave me a Tarot deck. It’s a traditional Rider-Waite deck (which doesn’t mention the illustrator Pamela Colman Smith, so now is referred to as Rider-Waite-Smith decks, or even Pamela Colman Smith decks). When you think of a deck of tarot cards, the images that come to mind first are probably this deck.
Balance.
The Autumn Equinox occurs at 9:30am on Tuesday, September 22 with equal amounts of daylight and nighttime, and signifying the beginning of our descent into six months where darkness reigns.
Yesterday, I pulled The High Priestess, which is my absolute favourite tarot card. And it seemed like such a perfect card to pull right before the Equinox. She lives between the black and white pillars, and has a mastery of the subconscious and intuition.
Big Voices for Kids
Fast forward to 2020. I was recently asked to develop a series of presentation skills and public speaking lessons for a network of kids across various countries in Africa. And then, out of the blue, a friend (who’s keeping her daughters home for now) asked if I ever worked with kids, as she felt like that would be a good enhancement for her online component.
How to Deliver a Great Presentation When Everything is Going Wrong
But - on this particular Zoom call, I couldn’t upload the doc. I have done this dozens of times over the past several months, and it was not an option. Not only that, I’d created a working document for crafting an Elevator Pitch as well, and I wasn’t going to be able to upload that, either. 2 critical documents for my workshop.
Life Lessons from a No-Travel Vacation
Here’s what I learned from vacation:
Cancel everything that isn’t vacation. I still took some calls and had sessions, and I wish I’d just completely cleared my plate so that I could sink into the fluffy, nurturing cushions of relaxation and brain drain.
It takes me 2-3 days to get out of “go” mode and into “slow” mode. And once I’m in slow mode, I don’t want to do anything that isn’t sleeping, napping, reading, snuggling, eating with the occasional distanced visit with friends.
Luck and Work
Yesterday, I found a four leaf clover. I have been actively looking for one for months. (It became my new thing to look for after PM Harper took the penny out of regular rotation.)
And then just like that, on a lawn with thousands of clovers, I noticed it.
Bad Dreams, Bad Luck, Turtles and Kismet
As you may recall from a recent Instagram post, I’m starting to explore my shadow self. This is a concept from Carl Jung and relating to our dark side - or the facets of yourself that you don’t like, and thus ignore. Some of you might know that I use tarot cards to help build my intuition.
Practise - Public Speaking Club
There are so many connotations to the word. There are law practises. An overarching word for a general theory of doing something is also called a practise. You can practise safe sex or yoga.
But the one I’m referring to is the act of doing something over and over again until it becomes comfortable. Like learning a new song on the guitar or piano, really building your confidence in public speaking requires practise. Actually doing it.
Body Language
Have you ever been walking behind somebody and you know exactly how they feel without having looked at their face? You suddenly get the sense that they are having a great day! Or, alternately, that something has happened, and today isn’t going well for them.
What about their walk is sending you these cues? How can you tell how somebody is feeling without looking at their face or hearing their story?
Figure Out Who You Are, And Be.
If you’ve just started to follow me or read my blog posts, this might be surprising, but I used to resist being myself online, in my role as a public speaking coach.
On my music accounts (did you know I’m also a musician?), I’d swear (something I do fairly regularly in real life - I like emphasis ;) ), talk about feminism and racism and things that mattered to me. I’d be silly and smart and not be bothered about my “professional image”.
However, the same was not true on my ubu skills accounts. I played it very safe. I felt that I needed to portray a professional neutrality in order to win over customers. Or at least, I thought I was playing it safe to be professional. The truth is: I was afraid.
Speak. Up.
This week, we’re getting uncomfortable. Because over the past few days, we have seen multiple examples of racial injustice, and if you believe in a world that is equal for everyone, and if you are somebody who has not experienced racism, you need to step up.
Conflict
Most of us try to avoid it. Some of us actively look for it. It’s the friction, the tension, the uncomfortable… it’s conflict.
How do you deal with conflict? There are so many different styles and techniques, thoughts, navigation procedures. Conflict management is taught in many staff retreats, College courses, and there are even entire companies devoted to it.
Text Mapping - A Deeper Look
If you haven’t had a chance to download my free public speaking guide, I’d suggest you do that and read over the section on text mapping (aka “Reading”, the 4th section of my public speaking system) before diving into this blog. Head on over to www.ubuskills.com and sign up for my mailing list - you’ll have the free guide delivered straight to your inbox!
Text mapping is the secret sauce, and I’ve written about it before here. You’ve probably heard me mention that when clients come to me and tell me that they are great when they speak off the cuff, but sound robotic when reading from a speech, I gently correct them to let them know they just haven’t learned this amazing skill.
Interested in Podcasting? Try these Vocal Tips!
Recently, I had the pleasure of co-presenting a webinar called Podcast Voice Work: How to Sound Amazing. If you missed it, it was recorded and you can watch it here.
I thought it would be helpful to write out the highlights in a blog post for those who are mulling over the idea of starting a podcast. There are lots of resources out there for how to structure your podcast, how to batch record, who to look for in a guest, and how to market your podcast. What I want to talk about is how to speak.
Why We Need To Be Visible
It’s coming up in all areas of my life right now. It’s a hot topic, and especially for women. It’s difficult, it’s complicated, sometimes it’s dangerous. It’s the need to show up and be seen.
We are in the middle of a global pandemic - most of us around the world have never experienced this kind of shut down, and certainly never in lived history has the entire world stopped.