The 5 Biggest Speaking & Presentation Mistakes I See And How To Fix Them
I highly recommend that you grab my free public speaking guide before diving in to this one! I reference a lot of the training from that guide/workbook.
I’m several years in, now, coaching people out from panic to confidence. It’s staggering to watch the variety of ways that speaking anxiety plays out for people, but what has also been amazing is the consistency.
Here’s what doesn’t seem to change (though individual cases may differ, I’m referring here to the majority of folks): somewhere early on (child to teen years), somebody made a remark that created a “belief” that you’re not a good speaker.
This could look like:
“Speak up, you’re always so quiet!”
“Your voice is so squeaky - speak in a lower tone or nobody will take you seriously.”
“You use your hands too much - it’s distracting.”
“You keep saying “umm” - it’s annoying and makes you sound stupid.”
It could also be more subtle, like forms of gaslighting where the other person laughs at your arguments or diminishes your contributions to the conversation.
Or parents who shut you down before you had the chance to speak up. Or parents/teachers who didn’t take you seriously because you were a kid.
Childhood, amirite?
The Good News
As much as the reasons for speaking anxiety tend to be somewhat consistent, the same is true for the training and the remedies. As I mentioned above, make sure you’ve got my free speaking guide to get effective, proven training and technique to improve and build your speaking skills. It’s a combination of my classical theatre training plus my 25+ years of performance experience that will help you become a powerful, calm and effective speaker. (Yes, even you.)
With that in mind, I present to you the 5 biggest mistakes I see, and how to fix them.
1. You Don’t Leave Enough Time To Be Ready
I’ve got lots of tips and tricks for how to get ready in my guide, but one of the biggest calendaring items I stress to my clients is this: make sure to carve out at least 10 minutes before your speech or presentation to get yourself into the right headspace. You’ll need time to practise controlled breathing. You’ll need time to be quiet and to focus, to remind yourself to stand using the principles of Alexander Technique, to give yourself a solid calm base from which to start. To make sure you’ve got all of your components ready (speech, water, quick check on how you look in the bathroom, etc.)
For me, this time is non negotiable. If people try to interrupt me, I let them know that I need some prep time and would love to chat later (this happens to me constantly before playing concerts, so I have a lot of practise).
I’ve seen months of prep work go down the drain because somebody got caught in a conversation and suddenly you’re meant to be on stage. Your adrenaline and cortisol spike and instantly you’re in stress mode.
This is easily avoided by spending 10 minutes in a bathroom stall to prepare your body and mind. Put it in your calendar. Have a reminder on your phone. Make it non negotiable.
2. You’re Not Prepared
Can I just say that I’m the worst for this? I am. The. Worst.
However, I also have the benefit of having given presentations, lead workshops and been on stage for decades, so I know how much time I need to prep. And what I now do is small bits of prep at a time, so it’s not overwhelming. So let me show you how I do it.
Sometimes we don’t get very much time to prepare for a meeting/presentation/speech. But usually we’ll have at least a week or 2 (or more if it’s a conference or something more formal). And here’s how you should break it down:
a) As soon as you find out, write down the main ideas of what you will present, and a skeleton structure. Not only does that get everything out of your head, but it creates a space for you to add to and subtract from as you get new ideas. It also reminds you what you’ll need to research.
b) Build your speech or presentation from that structure. Start filling in the details as they come to you. If you get an idea while you’re away from your notebook or computer, don’t hesitate - send yourself an email on your phone so that you don’t lose a great idea. Start to speak it out loud to hear how it sounds. Hearing it will often let you know if it’s going to sound smooth or not - we write differently for speaking than we do for essays/articles/papers etc.
c) About a week before, you should be finalized and practising your speech every day. Read it out loud at least once a day and continue to refine it. Make sure to do this in front of people: partners, roommates - even via Zoom. Don’t forget to use text mapping to help you take your presentation from okay to fabulous. (And remember that part of my job is to watch you present and to give feedback, so get in touch if that’s a service you need!)
If you plan to put in about 15 minutes/day, you’ll be able to get this all done well, without last minute crunching. (The 15/day can be combined for the major writing days.)
3. You Let One Mistake Dive Bomb Your Whole Presentation
I know, I know. Making a mistake can really throw you. It can create instant panic/embarrassment/wanting the floor to open up and swallow you whole. Just like you thought it would. Right?
But you don’t have to let a mistake derail all of your hard work. The chances of you making a mistake are pretty good - so let’s take a look at how to bounce back!
The first and best thing you can do is acknowledge your mistake, but keep it light. We all make mistakes, and truly, it’s no big deal. Your audience wants to know that you know when you’ve made a mistake, however, so a quick acknowledgment takes care of that.
Do a quick regroup and practise controlled breathing. This could be as easy as thinking “breathe in, 2, 3, hold, 2, 3, breathe out, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6”. You’re deescalating the spike of adrenaline and cortisol, and taking back control.
Go right back to Part 1 of my 4 part speaking system: standing. Roll up into a relaxed and strong physical stance and move through each of the 4 parts (find out how to do that here).
4. Not Doing Shadow Work/Mindset Work Ahead Of Time
A lot of time people will come to me with something specific: their voice is too pitchy; they need to learn how to be calm during a presentation; they’re petrified of speaking and always have been; and sometimes, they simply want to get better.
Almost every single time, practising shadow work and mindset work makes a huge difference.
If you’re not familiar with shadow work, grab my free shadow work workbook here.
Any time we’re dealing with fear or some kind of lack mindset (“I’m not good enough.” “People are going to think I’m stupid.”), there’s some inner work that has to be done before real improvement can happen.
Why do you think you’re a bad speaker? Where does that come from? Is it possible that an offhand comment from 20 years ago set the tone for how you think about yourself now? Can we fix that?
(Spoiler alert: we can!)
A combination of shadow work combined with incrementally putting yourself out there is the most grounding, most effective way to grow and become an excellent speaker.
5. Not Doing The Work
I mean, this is obvious. But I haven’t worked with somebody yet who has done the training, has done the practising, gets themselves set up properly, has given lots of time to prepare, and then completely sucks.
If it’s been a real struggle for you to give presentations before, your brain is going to try to trick you all the time to stop you from getting up there (and potentially dying, according to your brain). “You’re going to mess up and embarrass yourself in front of all of your colleagues!” “Who the hell do you think you are? You’re not an authority on this!” “You are so terrible, don’t do this to yourself.”
Sound familiar? Your brain doesn’t know the difference between mortal danger and giving a work presentation - it just recognizes fear and wants to keep you safe. But your thoughts aren’t real. And thankfully, us humans have the brain capacity to talk ourselves through the muck. And if we’re diligent about this (similar to the practise of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), you can retrain your thought patterns and form new neural pathways so that you’re not stuck in this idea that you’re terrible and will always be terrible for eternity.
Doesn’t that sound refreshing?
So the next time you have a presentation coming up and you’re feeling stressed about it, make sure you bookmark this blog post and go through the 5 mistakes and remedies (as well as practise the steps in my free public speaking guide). See how it helps you work through the challenges and sets you up to do an amazing job.
And then be sure to come back and leave a comment, or email me to let me know how it went!
You got this.
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