Eye Contact.
You've heard it said time and time again when preparing to speak: Make eye contact.
Most public speaking "how to" materials emphasize the importance of connecting with your audience, and most will demand that you give each person some eye time. I also teach the importance of eye contact, but my emphasis lies in doing it well.
Have you ever had a conversation with somebody who is speaking to your forehead? Do you find that you're able to take in what they're contributing to the conversation, or do you zone out, wondering if your forehead looks ok, or if you have something weird on your face that they are politely ignoring? You can't actually make a connection this way, as they are not engaging with you, but instead your apparently fabulous brow.
Same goes with public speaking: you can't fake connection.
I like to say that I teach you how to remove the barriers between what you are saying, and how your audience is taking it in. Anything that causes somebody to jerk out of their focused revery on you and your important message is a barrier to your goal.
If eye contact is an issue for you - if it makes you nervous, or if it causes you to break focus, there are other ways to make a connection with your audience. But I highly recommend practicing engaged communication with eye contact. Start with casual conversation with new people, or your cashier at the coffee shop, or your co-workers. Try a few small points of connection through your eyes. It will feel awful, but over time, it will become more comfortable. A theatre school Prof of mine used to recommend pretending to look at somebody as though your eyes were in the back of your skull - it softened the intensity of the eye contact.
And speaking of intensity: there is such a thing as too much. Do not make the mistake of relying on that one kind person who is engaging with your eye contact. Anywhere over 4-5 seconds means that your audience member, as he politely smiles at you nodding his head, is thinking "Oh my god why is she looking at me... this is way too intense... she has to stop... I'm going to have to look away... what is she talking about again?" Others in your audience will also feel anxiety from eye contact, and will avoid your gaze. Some will be taking notes, some might be pondering a point you just made, some might be snoozing... but hopefully not.
The mastery here lies in experience, in practice and in trial and error. The more you try, the better you'll get. Be sensitive to your audience - do try to give each person a bit of your direct one-on-one through eye contact, but make sure it's genuine. Forgo the forehead, and focus on the wall at the back of the room if you need to. Sometimes, as long as they can see your face, they're able to relax and take in your intoxicating words.
